C. A. Pack

Musings & Brainstorms & Rants

Siri Schmiri

I don’t know if you’ve seen any of the Apple commercials featuring Siri lately, but she’s supposed to be your own little BFF. In case you’ve been off-planet, Siri is a voice-activated assistant that will check your appointments, make phone calls for you, get directions to your favorite restaurant, and even call you a “Rock Star.” Except when she won’t. I don’t think Siri get’s along with everyone, because she sure as hell doesn’t get along with me.

I recently had trouble finding a restaurant where I was supposed to be attending a meeting. I risked picking up my cell phone while I was stopped at a light, to ask Siri to give me directions. I’m sure she thought, Ha! Gotcha! when she said, I’m sorry Carol, but I can’t help you right now. Please try again in a little while. Sure, she apologized, but it always seems that when I need her most, she’s got something better to do.

I also think Siri’s a little hard of hearing. The Black Forest Brew Haus in Farmingdale became the Brew House in Queens. And once, when I asked her to call Bob Lipper, she answered, Do you want me to call Bill Bleyer’s home number or his work number? “Bob Lipper,” I said a little louder and what I hoped was more clearly. I don’t see Barbara Lipper in your contacts. Perhaps you want me to call one of these: Bob Lipper… Barbara Paskoff…” “Call Bob Lipper’s cell phone,” I said a little more confidently. You don’t have a cell phone listing for Bill Bleyer. Would you like me to call Bill Bleyer on his home phone or his work phone?

And God forbid I continue asking the same question in different ways, hoping Siri will eventually catch on. She actually gets snippy in her replies. But the absolute worst is when she feigns ignoreance. I’m sorry, Carol, but I don’t understand the question. Just because I asked her what I should buy my brother for his birthday…

All I’m saying is, don’t expect Siri to be your bosom buddy, because she can turn on you on a dime.